I have been doing good with my grieving lately. But now that Mother's Day is around the corner I feel myself shrinking back into myself again. Not wanting to hang out with people, feeling tired, gazing at the things I have to remember Landon by. Some days it feels like I am going backwards in my grieving process. Mother's Day was such an amazing day for me last year. I was pregnant with Landon and I even got engaged on that day! Now this year I have no baby to "mother". I feel anxious about the day and I am not really sure what I want to do that day. The hardest part of the grieving process has been the guilt and the absence of feeling motherly. Although people tell me they consider me a mother it is not an adjective I would apply to myself. I am sure that these feeling will pass but it is affecting me more than I care to admit! I guess its time to start praying!